I tried to hard to keep my cool about it as P gave me the news as if this was a man that we hardly knew. P ate dinner, read the paper, and cooly said "oh by the way, did you hear that Captain America was in an accident?" I tried to keep my composure, but my heart was lodged in my throat. All I heard was head injury, and hospital stay. I wanted to break down and cry. I realized that I could have lost him just like that.
P didn't seem very concerned, like men get into motorcycle accidents every day. He did say, "Thank God it didn't happen when Mark took Derek for a ride." I agreed with him, of course, but decided not to remind him that Mark took me for a ride on that same day as well. Guess that he forgot that little tidbit of information.
When I asked for more information on the accident, he became aggravated because he was in the middle of watching his precious Phillies game. He sighed and said "why don't you ask him yourself?" I expressed doubts about visiting T in the hospital, and said "What would people think?" P laughed out loud as if it was the funniest thing he had ever heard. I guess he assumed that no one in the world would get the wrong idea.
What makes him so sure of that? Am I that unattractive in his eyes? Sometimes I wonder why he married me in the first place. We hardly talk to each other, and when we do, it's about Derek or work--it's never about us. As for sex, I might as well be a nun.
No matter. I'm getting my wish. I am going to see T at the hospital tomorrow, and with my husband's blessing.
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