SHE DOESN'T RECOGNIZE ME, BUT THAT'S OKAY

Dedicated to my friend, Mary.  This is my latest post on my other blog:  

SHE DOESN'T RECOGNIZE ME, BUT THAT'S OKAY

THANKSGIVING ANXIETY - UNEDITED

Thanksgiving is just around the corner.  So much to do with so little time.  We are having company at our home this year.  We are having turkey, stuffing and all the trimmings, and will have the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade playing on the background.  It is one of my favorite holidays, outside of Christmas.

I have to admit that even though this holiday is one of my favorites, this year I am dreading it.  I'm having the in-laws over, and Philip's sister, husband and children.  I love them, but for the past ten years of my marriage, I have felt that they tolerate me, at the most.  It is always such a stressful  time when they are over.  My niece and nephew run around the house, which makes Derek a lunatic.  Philip's parents seem to complain about everything;  the traffic, the food, the decorations.  I try so hard to please them, but whatever I do does not seem to be enough for them.

But I will soldier on, as usual, and watch the clock counting the hours before they leave. The Girardis are stopping by at around seven, and this might be the last time that we spend Thanksgiving together.  Hopefully, Philip's family will be gone by then and I can relax.

HALLOWEEN FESTIVITIES - WITH COMMENTARY

We had a very busy two days.

For the edited version of this post, click here

Today, I was at Derek's school, helping with the class party.  I made 24 white cupcakes with orange icing (with pumpkin faces on top).  There are sixteen kids in the class, but there were no cupcakes left over.  They were a big hit.  I had made Halloween spice cookies (A Martha Stewart recipe), but I decided that maybe it would be a little too spicy for the kids.  (I ATE THEM ALL)

Last night, there was a Halloween parade at the park.  The kids walked around the baseball fields a few times.  It was dark, and a little cold.  I was not thrilled about that, since it started at five, and we usually have dinner at 5:30.  It screwed up my whole schedule, but Derek had a good time, and that is what was important.  (I BLAME THIS ALL ON CLAUDIA PERKINS.  IT WAS HER STUPID IDEA TO HAVE THIS PARADE AT NIGHT IN THE FIRST PLACE.  NORMALLY IT WOULD BE DURING THE SCHOOL DAY ON HALLOWEEN)

After dinner last night, Philip and Derek carved the pumpkin and displayed it in the bay window.  (THEY DIDN'T WANT MY HELP, OR LISTEN TO MY SUGGESTIONS) Afterwards, we watched “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” on DVD (I WAS ACTUALLY CLEANING THE KITCHEN AT THIS TIME, AND IT WAS OVER BEFORE I WAS DONE)

Tonight (Halloween), Derek dressed as a pilot, in a brown jumper with Air Force logo and white helmet.  I do not know where he got the idea, but he has wanted to be a pilot for the past year.  Unfortunately, it was so cold and windy outside today that Derek had to wear his winter jacket.  He was not happy, but I did not want him to be sick for a week.  There were not many kids out there today; meanwhile, Philip, Derek and I were out for two hours. (I REALLY DO HATE HALLOWEEN- I'D RATHER JUST BUY A BAG OF TREATS AND BE DONE WITH IT.  BUT, DEREK LOVES HALLOWEEN, AND SO DOES PHILIP.  HE SEEMED TO TAKE A KEEN INTEREST IN ROBERTA, WHO WAS DRESSED IN A SKIMPY CAT COSTUME AND WALKING AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD LIKE SOME KIND OF TRAMP.  I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY SHE WAS OUT THERE.  HER KIDS DON'T TRICK OR TREAT ANY MORE)

Once home, I made apple cider for the three of us, then we went through Derek’s bag.  (POCKETED A FEW DOZEN MINI-CHOCOLATES FOR MYSELF WHEN THEY WERE NOT LOOKING.  HEY...I WAS OUT THERE TOO)  I was so happy to be home and done with Halloween for this year. 

It is time to start planning for Thanksgiving.  GOD HELP ME

WHEN FRIENDS MOVE AWAY - WITH COMMENTARY

Philip, Derek and I went to dinner last night at our next door neighbor's house on the left side, the Girardi's (Roberta is on the other side). AND ROBERTA AND I DO NOT GET LIKE EACH OTHER AT ALL.  They said that they had something to tell us (WHICH IS NEVER A GOOD SIGN), and since it was a school night, I thought that it was a little out of the ordinary.  While we were there, they told us that they are moving to Texas because Bob has been transferred.  They will be gone within the month (SON OF A BITCH! NOW I'M STUCK WITH ROBERTA AND WILL HAVE TO START ALL OVER AGAIN WITH SOMEONE ELSE ON THE OTHER SIDE!).

I am heartbroken for Derek .  The news hit him especially hard because he is friends with their two children, Jackie 10, and Curtis 8.  He and Curtis are like two peas in a pod, and Derek plays with him just about every day. (TO SAY THE LEAST- CURTIS IS HIS ONLY REAL FRIEND. WHAT IS HE GOING TO DO NOW?)  He doesn't seem to understand why things like this happen, and both Philip and I spent a lot of time talking to him about it.

I'm not looking forward to that day.

ALL HAIL THE FOOTBALL WIDOW

I decided to take this whole post off my other blog, and put it here.  Too much truth.


Philip is now watching the Eagles.  Two hours ago, he was screaming at the Jets.  Another Sunday has gone down the drain.  I hate football season, but baseball season is longer, so I'm screwed either way.

I made a great dinner today.   Roasted chicken...beautiful bird.  Mashed potatoes, green beans, gravy, yummy.  I wish that I had taken a picture before I carved it up.

Had to call the boys in from the living room to eat it.  I say boys, because on football Sunday, Philip acts like one. He spends the day yelling at the tv and making a complete ass out of himself.  

I thought that I timed the dinner well enough: 4:00.  It was supposed to be between games.  But they did not want to miss the beginning of the Eagles game, so they shoveled down their food like it was take out from McDonald's.  Then they parked their butts back on the couch.  I was left to clean the table, wash the dishes, and put them away,  with no help from either one of them.  I felt like the maid.

Maybe I'm just overreacting, but I would love to spend at least one Sunday out with the family.  I'm sick of being a football widow.

THE NOT SO NATURAL - UN-EDITED

THIS IS THE UN-EDITED version of the post on my other blog.  I decided that it would be best to edit some stuff out just in case anyone reads my blog.  For the edited version, click here.  This version tells you what I really think.

Well, I've come to realize that Derek is not a natural soccer player.  He barely runs to the ball and spends most of his time twirling to see his shadow.  He does like that shadow. It's pretty embarrassing, but that's my boy.  I don't think that he would even be in sports if Philip didn't push him to do it.  Philip is trying to build character, and thinks that it's good for Derek to embarrass himself on a weekly basis.  I can't say that I agree with him.  Thank God that today was the last game.

Of course, Claudia Perkins (PTA boss) was there proudly watching her grandson score three goals.  The kid is a monster (and a bully, by the way).  The children seem to part like the Red Sea to let him through.  Maybe they are just trying to preserve their own lives.  I don't know.  I really makes me sick.

After the game, I drove Derek to the mall and we went to Sprinkle City. I was going to take him to see a movie, but I didn't know what time Philip was going to be home from work.  Had to get dinner ready, etc.  The lasagna came out great as usual.  Love that stuff.

After ice cream and lasagna today, I can safely say that I'm off the diet until Monday.

SO MUCH FOR THE DIET - UN-EDITED

I just inhaled a whole frigging bag of kettle corn.  So much for the diet.  I really want to lose at least 20 lbs by Christmas.  I was doing so well.  Tomorrow's the weekend, and I'm making lasagna.  Looks like I'm starting the diet on Monday (again).

Halloween is looming.  Chloe, I and the kids always go through the neighborhood together.  Most of the time, Philip walks with us, although he's been pretty busy at work as an accountant.  I really don't like Halloween much, but then again it gives me an excuse to pick through Derek's bag looking for the Reese's.  See?  That's not helping my diet either.  That reminds me, I have to go to the mall and pick up a pilot costume.

Philip was watching the Phillies last night (again).  It's impossible to talk to him when he's watching baseball.  I could have danced in front of the tv with nothing on, and he would not have seen me.  Forget about anything else.  Once again, I felt invisible.

It's no wonder that I'm shoveling down kettle corn like it's going out of style.  I feel like a cloistered nun, for God's sake!

INTRODUCTION - I'M STARTING TO LOSE MY MIND, AND NEEDED A NEW BLOG

I'm not clinically losing my mind (although I haven't actually been tested), but I want to write about how I was really feeling deep down inside. I can't use my other blog because too many friends and family members of mine read it (or I think that they might).  Here I can vent without worrying about who reads it.  It is my secret diary.  Here, you will find the unedited versions of my posts.  Even though I am a fictional character, I could be like you.


For my personal blog that everyone can see, click here:  Victoria's Diary , and you can find out my history, and what goes on in my day to day life.    Start from the beginning there, and check in here for the real story.   I will still be posting there, but all my inner thoughts, secrets and desires will be here.  Hopefully, nobody I know will read this blog.